Mosaic Me
Original artwork by Renee J. Moore. Image is not to be used without permission of owner.
Monday, August 17, 2009
Restless Stillness
In the restlessness of the stillness, I ask You to speak. In the anxiety of the quietness, I long to hear Your voice. Your voice alone, My Lord, do I strain to hear. Speak it loud...speak it clear...Your voice, I ache for...I am still, and I know that You are God.
Monday, August 3, 2009
The Journal of My Journey
Late Sunday afternoon I returned from the "She Speaks" conference hosted by Proverbs 31 Ministries based in Concord, NC. Today, I sit at this computer realizing even more than before that truly I am a Bambi. (If you wish to receive the last email devotional, "Buck in Your Bambi," and would like me to send it to ya, just let me know.)
Over 600 women walked through the revolving doors of the hotel as pieces of candy on a conveyor belt seeking to be wrapped in a pretty package of preparedness. We sought to be ready for delivery as a spokeswomen of sweetness to the world for the sake of Christ. Remember the candy factory episode of I Love Lucy? Lucy and Ethel worked in a candy factory for a brief, very brief, time and paced themselves frantically to wrap each piece of candy as it passed on the conveyor belt. Some of the candy ended up on the floor, others were smashed, and even a few were stuffed in Lucy and Ethel's mouth! As one of the pieces of candy that walked through the conveyor belt doors of She Speaks 2009, I, too, was smashed, chewed up, and even face down on the floor. Certainly not by any of the sisters of Proverbs 31 Ministries! I wrestled with Satan. I wrestled with self. I wrestled with God. I surrendered.
The saving grace of God worked his wonder as He processed me past Lysa Terkeurst, Renee Swope, Micca Campbell and Rachel Olsen (just to name a few). Every women who passed through had her own flavor of creamy center. God controlled the pace of the process for me, even through the smashing, spewing and chewing! Sunday morning I woke to this verse resounding in my head: "We are hard pressed on every side, yet not crushed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed - always carrying about in the body the dying of the Lord Jesus, that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our body." (2 Corinthians 4:8-10) Thoughts reeled in my head that I didn't want to be a look-a-like! I feared I would loose my heart and passion for the sake of saying the oh-so-right things as a speaker and in the oh-so-right format. I feared of looking like a Lysa clone...dressing in just the right fashion...speaking with just the right inflection. "God, I don't want to look and taste like every other piece of candy on this conveyor belt! I want to be the mushy-centered me that you created me to be!" His reply? "Oh, my sweetness, you are. You are just a mini-me...just a bite size of what I want you to become." God proceeded to impress upon my heart that I needed a teachable spirit. He gently explained that I needed to know how to use my words wisely and how to dress without distractions.
You see, for so long, I have struggled...wrestled...with this feeling of a calling. Is it to teach? To speak? To preach? It seemed that the few people I've expressed this feeling to just didn't get me! They just didn't seem to get what I've been saying. God gets me. Proverbs 31 Ministry gets me. As my conversation with God continued Sunday morning, He turned my attention to the complete passage of the verses He used to wake me. "Therefore, since we have this ministry, as we have received mercy, we do not lose heart. But we have renounced the hidden things of shame, not walking in craftiness nor handling the word of God deceitfully, but by manifestation of the truth commending ourselves to every man's conscience in the sight of God...For we do not preach ourselves, but Christ Jesus the Lord, and ourselves your bondservants for Jesus' sake...since we have the same spirit of faith, according to what is written, "I believed and therefore I spoke," we also believe and therefore speak, knowing that He who raised up the Lord Jesus will also raise us up with Jesus, and will present us with you." (2 Corinthians, Chapter 4) God spoke to me and said, "Renee, it doesn't matter if people call it teaching, speaking or preaching. You have been called to speak. I will take care of how it is received regardless." So, she speaks. Jesus raised me up, and I must speak it out.
Are you curious to know if that is the verse She Speaks ministry is founded upon? I am! I have no idea and know nothing about those details of the ministry. All I know is GOD SPOKE...and is still speaking!
You and I may look the same on the outside as a variety of vessels shaped with limbs, eyes, ears, noses as all that He created, but inside there is a flavor that only YOU have...a unique personality...gifting of some kind...one-of-a-kind opportunities. You see, God is not only speaking to me. He is also speaking to you. At times you may feel like you're blending in with the rest of the world in your shiny packaging, but you are not! Some may think shiny wrapper; some may think dull covering! Point is: You have a real, true-blue, sweet center of the truffle He created you to be. Bite-size or not...He has plans for you. His plans are that you speak. Yes, speak! If it's speaking to your co-worker, the person at the restaurant, the stranger on the street, or the family in your home...just speak His name.
Hey, imagine if the sweet saints of Corinthian church and Paul had resisted to speak the gospel of Jesus Christ. We would not know our Jesus. My heart cringes at the thought! Saints, it's time we all speak the language of love through Jesus Christ to the world! So, speak!
Lord, thank you for the saints before me who spoke of You. Empower us with the same boldness to proclaim your fame to the world!
Over 600 women walked through the revolving doors of the hotel as pieces of candy on a conveyor belt seeking to be wrapped in a pretty package of preparedness. We sought to be ready for delivery as a spokeswomen of sweetness to the world for the sake of Christ. Remember the candy factory episode of I Love Lucy? Lucy and Ethel worked in a candy factory for a brief, very brief, time and paced themselves frantically to wrap each piece of candy as it passed on the conveyor belt. Some of the candy ended up on the floor, others were smashed, and even a few were stuffed in Lucy and Ethel's mouth! As one of the pieces of candy that walked through the conveyor belt doors of She Speaks 2009, I, too, was smashed, chewed up, and even face down on the floor. Certainly not by any of the sisters of Proverbs 31 Ministries! I wrestled with Satan. I wrestled with self. I wrestled with God. I surrendered.
The saving grace of God worked his wonder as He processed me past Lysa Terkeurst, Renee Swope, Micca Campbell and Rachel Olsen (just to name a few). Every women who passed through had her own flavor of creamy center. God controlled the pace of the process for me, even through the smashing, spewing and chewing! Sunday morning I woke to this verse resounding in my head: "We are hard pressed on every side, yet not crushed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed - always carrying about in the body the dying of the Lord Jesus, that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our body." (2 Corinthians 4:8-10) Thoughts reeled in my head that I didn't want to be a look-a-like! I feared I would loose my heart and passion for the sake of saying the oh-so-right things as a speaker and in the oh-so-right format. I feared of looking like a Lysa clone...dressing in just the right fashion...speaking with just the right inflection. "God, I don't want to look and taste like every other piece of candy on this conveyor belt! I want to be the mushy-centered me that you created me to be!" His reply? "Oh, my sweetness, you are. You are just a mini-me...just a bite size of what I want you to become." God proceeded to impress upon my heart that I needed a teachable spirit. He gently explained that I needed to know how to use my words wisely and how to dress without distractions.
You see, for so long, I have struggled...wrestled...with this feeling of a calling. Is it to teach? To speak? To preach? It seemed that the few people I've expressed this feeling to just didn't get me! They just didn't seem to get what I've been saying. God gets me. Proverbs 31 Ministry gets me. As my conversation with God continued Sunday morning, He turned my attention to the complete passage of the verses He used to wake me. "Therefore, since we have this ministry, as we have received mercy, we do not lose heart. But we have renounced the hidden things of shame, not walking in craftiness nor handling the word of God deceitfully, but by manifestation of the truth commending ourselves to every man's conscience in the sight of God...For we do not preach ourselves, but Christ Jesus the Lord, and ourselves your bondservants for Jesus' sake...since we have the same spirit of faith, according to what is written, "I believed and therefore I spoke," we also believe and therefore speak, knowing that He who raised up the Lord Jesus will also raise us up with Jesus, and will present us with you." (2 Corinthians, Chapter 4) God spoke to me and said, "Renee, it doesn't matter if people call it teaching, speaking or preaching. You have been called to speak. I will take care of how it is received regardless." So, she speaks. Jesus raised me up, and I must speak it out.
Are you curious to know if that is the verse She Speaks ministry is founded upon? I am! I have no idea and know nothing about those details of the ministry. All I know is GOD SPOKE...and is still speaking!
You and I may look the same on the outside as a variety of vessels shaped with limbs, eyes, ears, noses as all that He created, but inside there is a flavor that only YOU have...a unique personality...gifting of some kind...one-of-a-kind opportunities. You see, God is not only speaking to me. He is also speaking to you. At times you may feel like you're blending in with the rest of the world in your shiny packaging, but you are not! Some may think shiny wrapper; some may think dull covering! Point is: You have a real, true-blue, sweet center of the truffle He created you to be. Bite-size or not...He has plans for you. His plans are that you speak. Yes, speak! If it's speaking to your co-worker, the person at the restaurant, the stranger on the street, or the family in your home...just speak His name.
Hey, imagine if the sweet saints of Corinthian church and Paul had resisted to speak the gospel of Jesus Christ. We would not know our Jesus. My heart cringes at the thought! Saints, it's time we all speak the language of love through Jesus Christ to the world! So, speak!
Lord, thank you for the saints before me who spoke of You. Empower us with the same boldness to proclaim your fame to the world!
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